By MICHAEL PARENTE

Call Sports Writer

The reporter stood face-to-face with Clubber Lang in the dressing room and boldly asked the fighter to predict the outcome of his upcoming rematch against Rocky Balboa.

“Prediction?” replied Lang.

“Yes, prediction.”

Lang – played brilliantly by 1980s action icon Mr. T – paused briefly and fixed his eyes on the camera with a cold, intimidating glare before answering, “Pain!”

The aforementioned scene from Sylvester Stallone’s “Rocky III” aptly reflects the unwavering confidence of every Patriots’ fan from Bangor to Beijing in regards to today’s AFC championship game against the San Diego Chargers.

Last year, there was a slight sense of trepidation – albeit among the minority – because the Patriots had to travel to Indianapolis to face the Colts, who had beaten them at Gillette Stadium earlier that season and now had the advantage of playing in their climate-controlled dome. Sure enough, the Colts fought back in the second half and rallied for a stunning, 38-34, victory, denying the Patriots what would’ve been their fourth trip to the Super Bowl in six years.

A lot has changed since last January – not just the team, but also the attitude among the fans. Sports talk radio callers (whether they represent the fanbase or not is irrelevant because they have the loudest voice) displayed an assertive confidence this week bordering on arrogance. The verdict? The banged-up Chargers have no chance.

Who can argue? The Patriots are 17-0 heading into today’s game against a team they already crushed in Week 2 by a lopsided score of 38-14. Their opponent is playing its 13^th game in as many weeks fresh off a 3,000-mile trip from California to Foxboro.

And if that weren’t enough, San Diego’s starting quarterback, Philip Rivers, is doubtful with a knee injury that was recently revealed to be a partial tear in the anterior cruciate ligament. Even if he plays, he might be without his most dangerous weapon in the passing game, tight end Antonio Gates, who is doubtful with a toe injury. That means All-Pro running back LaDainian Tomlinson will have to carry the load on his hyperextended left knee. 

This isn’t a football team; it’s a MASH unit. Even the Chargers’ strengths will be met with resistance. San Diego boasts one of the best front sevens in the league, led by outside linebackers Shawne Merriman (12 ½ sacks) and Shaun Phillips (8 ½), but the Patriots can suppress the Chargers’ pass rush with an offensive line that features three Pro-Bowlers and has allowed only 21 sacks on 578 pass attempts.

The Chargers also led the league with 30 interceptions – 10 by second-year cornerback Antonio Cromartie, who finished first in the NFL despite starting only eight games – yet Brady only got picked nine times this year. The only full-time starters who threw fewer interceptions were Jacksonville’s David Garrard and Philadelphia’s Donovan McNabb, but they also attempted 253 and 195 fewer passes, respectively.

One thing the Chargers might be able to do is run the ball with their 1-2 punch of Tomlinson and Michael Turner, perhaps an effective strategy against the Patriots’ erratic defense. Then again, Jacksonville entered last week’s divisional playoff game ranked second in the NFL in rushing and finished with a mere 80 yards on 22 carries.

History suggests the Patriots will take away what the Chargers do best. That’s what they’ve done for the past eight years under head coach Bill Belichick, who studies game film and tendencies until he has the perfect blueprint for shutting down the opponent.

Go back to 2004 when the Patriots – missing two starting cornerbacks and defensive end Richard Seymour – clobbered the Colts, 20-3, in the divisional playoffs at home. Peyton Manning threw 49 touchdown passes that year, but finished just 27-of-42 as New England’s makeshift defense limited the Colts to a field goal.

Or how about a week later when the Patriots traveled to Pittsburgh to face the top-seeded Steelers in the AFC title game? Pittsburgh finished the season ranked second in the league in rushing, but the Patriots held Jerome Bettis to 64 yards in a 41-27 rout. Once again, the brilliant mastermind took away his opponent’s strength like a schoolyard bully ripping off someone’s lunch money.

Let’s make one thing clear – the Chargers are an impressive football team and deserve more respect than they’ve gotten this week for beating the Colts at home in the playoffs. Head coach Norv Turner deserves some kudos, too, for winning back-to-back playoff games, including a stunning victory last weekend in Indianapolis. That’s more than anyone can say for his predecessor Marty Schottenheimer, who is 5-13 lifetime in the postseason.

This probably won’t even be the last time these two teams meet in the playoffs. The Patriots won’t be loosening their grip on the AFC for quite some time and the Chargers have at least eight Pro-Bowl caliber players all in their prime. This has the potential to become the NFL’s next great rivalry.

San Diego will eventually have its day in the sun – just like the Colts did last season after years and years of playoff futility – but it won’t be Sunday. Not this time. The Patriots are just too talented and too deep to suffer a letdown in their own backyard with a trip to the Super Bowl on the line. That’s a fact – and it could be a painful one for the Chargers.