Jenny Diaz performs a skit at Davies Wednesday about a student involved in a violent relationship. Diaz, a junior at the school, is a member of the Davies SADD program (Students Against Destructive Decisions). Call photo/Ernest A. Brown 

By JON BAKER

LINCOLN  ---  For 16 years now, Chris Burke has taught culinary arts at the William M. Davies Jr. Career and Technical High School, though he admits the last few have been particularly painful.

He sat at a table in the school’s Patriot Room and spoke of his daughter’s murder back in September 2005 — how Lindsay Ann Burke’s “beloved” boyfriend had attacked her, and how the young woman with so much talent and love for humanity had become a victim of dating violence.
In an adjacent room, his wife, Ann, conducted a workshop entitled “Healthy/ Unhealthy Relationships: Teen Dating Violence Curriculum” before approximately 45 health and physical education teachers from around the state.
Those instructors had come to the seminar not only to hear the Burkes’ sad story, but to learn more about helping their students steer well clear of such trouble.
“When that tragic event happened, the news spread through Davies like wildfire,” stated Chris, who hails from North Kingstown.
“When the students and faculty found out, they embraced us with more love than we could ever know. They got together and bought Lindsay a star in a constellation through the Star Registry, and that blew us away.
“Then they decided to sell rubber bracelets to remember her, and (athletic director) Bill Murphy started selling T-shirts to students in October 2006, and again last year, to promote teen dating violence awareness and education.
“Ann and I could have sat around and done nothing,” Chris said, “but she’s a registered nurse and also a health teacher at Curtis Corner Middle School (in South Kingstown), and she figured — with those two professions — she had a perfect avenue to educate teachers about the subject,” he added. “In turn, they would educate the kids.”
In short, Ann parlayed her grief into action. She enlisted the aid of Attorney General Patrick Lynch’s office, and together they composed a bill entitled the “Lindsay Ann Burke Act,” which mandates that all Rhode Island public schools must teach teen dating violence to students in grades 7-12.
The bill was passed last year after some “amazing” speeches to a legislative committee from a handful of Davies Tech students and teachers.
“Shortly after my daughter’s death, I went to a silent march, and I met Patrick Lynch there,” Ann Burke said. “He was very warm and caring, and he offered his support to my family. He also said he’d meet with us any time. I don’t know too many government officials who would respond like that, but I was very impressed.
“I later found out the state of Massachusetts had a program concerning teen dating violence, and I thought to myself, ‘If Massachusetts has something like that, why can’t we?’ I knew it had to be addressed like any other issue, like teaching kids about drug and alcohol abuse.”2

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Call this the third installment, and the second at Davies since last October.
Among the topics addressed: How to define teen dating violence; statistics and prevalence; the four types of violence; warning signs; cycles of abuse; how to respond to a victim; and community resources.
Curricula created by Liz Claiborne Inc. (“Love is Not Abuse”) and Hazeldon (“Safe Dates”) were distributed to all in attendance. Those materials cost $200 per person, a cost borne by the Lindsay Ann Burke Memorial Fund.
Likewise, Lynch offered a 30-minute speech on the subject, and the Davies after-school group SADD (Students Against Destructive Decisions) assembled a 15-minute play exhibiting what a teen-age girl goes through as a victim.
According to Karen Murphy, a health instructor at South Kingstown High School, it’s defined as a pattern of controlling, abusive behavior in a romantic relationship. It can include verbal, emotional, physical, sexual and financial abuse.
“The statistics are staggering,” Murphy said.
She wasn’t kidding. Girls and women between the ages of 16-24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence, and one in five high school girls is physically or sexually hurt by a dating partner, according to U.S. Department of Justice statistics.
“One in every three teens experience some kind of abuse in their romantic relationships,” Murphy said. “A lot of people don’t realize how serious those numbers are.”

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In his speech, Lynch said his office sees domestic violence cases “time and time again, and Ann took the initiative to get this rolling. Out of the pain and torment, Ann thought, ‘What else can I do to make sure this doesn’t happen again?’ In most cases, (family members) will pull back, stay at home … Closure never happens.
“Take a murder trial,” he continued. “Days, months, years later, the lawyers, the judge, the jurors, they all go back to work, but where does the mother go?
“I don’t understand how any family member of a victim makes it through it all. I know I didn’t suffer emotionally like they did. I see it, but I don’t feel it to that extent. But then folks like Ann come along and decide they’re not going to stand pat.”
To the teachers, he added, “You people are in the front lines, and you do an excellent job of educating. Some things are mandated, like sex education and drug and alcohol abuse. But dating violence wasn’t consistently taught across the board. It is now.”
Lynch said Rhode Island is the first state in the nation to have passed such a law, and noted that Ann Burke will meet with him in Utah at the National Association of Attorneys General conference this summer. That’s when Lynch will be named the new NAAG president. He hopes Ann’s presentation will convince others AGs to push for similar mandates.
In the skit by SADD, Davies junior Jenny Diaz of Central Falls splendidly portrayed a victim of such violence, and addressed background voices depicting their opinions as to how to deal with her unhealthy romance.
“It’s extremely powerful,” Murphy said. “When I got a hold of it, it had kind of an adult theme, so (Davies’) teachers and students tweaked it to something the kids could relate to. It makes you think about what the victim is feeling — the ambivalence, guilt, shame, fear.
“When you’re teaching this subject, a key component is understanding why a victim stays in a relationship,” she added. “It’s all because of guilt, low self-esteem, love, but fear is the biggest reason — fear of not being believed, of retaliation, of judgment, of being alone. When you’re a teen-ager, those are huge emotions.
“From the time they’re youngsters, parents and others will say to a first- or second-grader, ‘Is he your boyfriend?’ That leaves the indelible message that being in a relationship is of the utmost importance. The fact is, it isn’t. Dating violence knows no bounds, and this is the age we need to get to them.”